英语幽默故事实用.pdfVIP

1 ．绝 配 一位富婆为拥有一只珍贵的古玩而深感骄傲， 以至于她竟要把卧室漆成与花瓶同样的颜 色。几名油漆匠试图调出这个底色，但是谁也没有能令那位怪癖的妇女满意。 最后来了位油漆匠。 他非常自信能调出那种颜色。 那妇女对他的成果非常满意， 油漆匠 于是一举成名。 多年以后，他退休了，生意也交给儿子。 “爸，”儿子说， “有件事我得弄清楚，您是怎 样使墙的颜色与花瓶配得那么绝的？” “儿子，”父亲回答说， “我漆了花瓶。” Perfect Match A wealthy matron is so proud of a valuable antique vase that she decides to have her bedroom painted the same color as the vase. Several painters try to match the shade, but none comes close enough to satisfy the eccentric woman. Eventually, a painter approacheswho is confident he can mix the proper color. The woman is pleased with the result, and the painter becomes famous. Years later, he retires and truns the businessover to his son. Dad, says the son, theres something Ive got to know. How did you get those walls to match the vase so perfectly? Son, the father replies, I painted the vase. 2.一个数学问题 比尔是一个好学生， 也是个聪明的孩子。 他喜欢学数学， 课本上所有的数学问题他都能 不费劲地解答。 有一天，在上学路上，比尔经过一家水果店。该店窗户上有个招牌上写着： “苹果-- 五 美分六个。 ”比尔脑筋一转，进了店门。 “苹果怎么卖？” ？“五美分六个。 ” “但我不想要六个。 ” “你想要几个？” “这不是我想要几个的问题。 这是个数学问题。 ” “数学问题？你说这话是什么意思？” “你看，如果六个苹果五美分，那么五个苹果四美分，四个苹果三美分，三个苹果二美 分，二个苹果一美分， 一个苹果就不要钱。 我只要一个苹果， 如果一个苹果一分钱也不要的 话，那我也就没必要给你钱了。 ” 比尔拣了一个好苹果， 开始吃了起来， 然后兴高采烈地迈出了店门。 那个售货员吃惊地 望着这个小男孩，一句话也说不出来。 A Problem in Arithmetic Bill is a good student and an intelligent boy. He likes to study arithmetic, and he can do all of the arithmetic problems in his book easily. One day on his way to school Bill passeda fruit store. There was a sign in the window which said, Apple-Six for five cents. An idea came to Bill and he went into the store. How much are the apples? he asked the sto