幸福不仅仅是快乐.docVIP

幸福不仅仅是快乐：四步带你找到真正的幸福 Two months ago a new client entered my office for her first coaching session. All I want is to feel happy, she said. Im miserable and I focus on that misery all day long. 两个月前，一个新客户来到我的办公室参加她的第一次辅导课。“我要的是感到高兴，”她说，“我很痛苦，而且我整天专注于怎样把自己从痛苦中解救出来。” It seemed like a fairly simple request, so we went to work. 这似乎是一个非常简单的要求，所以我们就开始了。 Week after week I witnessed the smile on my clients face becoming more consistent, more authentic. Soon she began talking about the laughter and pleasant activities that now fill her days. So I asked whether she thought that we had achieved her happiness goal. I was surprised when she said no. 几周过后，我亲眼目睹了我的客户脸上露出坚定真诚的笑容。因此她开始谈论每天充斥在身边的笑料和愉快的活动。因此我问她是否认为我们已经达到了她的幸福目标，但我很惊讶的是她说“没有”。 What I learned is that this?vibrant?woman believed that in order to characterize herself as happy she could never feel sad. To her, sadness and other unpleasant feelings are not allowed in the life of someone who defines themselves as a happy person. But that is not what the human experience is actually about. 我了解到的是，这个充满活力的女人认为，为了让她看起来很幸福，她不能觉得悲伤。对她来说，悲伤等不愉快的情绪在生活中是不允许出现在一个幸福的人身上的。但是这不是真正的人生体验。 If we dont allow a natural progression of the resulting unpleasant feelings we will never fully experience and embrace the joy in life. Thats right; where there is black, there is white, its just how nature works. There are two complementary forces that make up all aspects of life and we must allow and accept their balance. 如果我们不允许一个不愉快情绪的自然的产生，我们就无法体验和拥抱生活的乐趣。正是这样；当有黑暗的地方就有光明，这才是自然的。生活的各个方面都有两个互补的力量，我们必须允许和接受它们的平衡。 This is the understanding that my client was missing. 这是我的顾客对生活漏掉的领悟。 And it begs the question: Happiness--what is it, really? 它引出了一个问题：幸福——到底是什么？ In simplest form, happiness is a state of being. Sure, our circumstances influence the level of happiness we can access, but happiness is within us, not around us. We all have it, but we each define it differently and have varying expectations of ourselves and our own abilities to be happy. And that i