2016年高考英语写作最后冲刺 训练、点评和猜题 03（含解析）.docVIP

2016届高考英语写作最后冲刺 训练、点评和猜题 03（含解析） 练习一 手机和我们的生活越来越密切，让我们的联系变得更加方便，可有人认为手机并不利于真正的交流。校报英文版正在开展征文活动，发起对这一话题的讨论，你认为手机对人与人之间沟通的影响是利大于弊还是弊大于利？请你以“Mobile phones, good or bad for communication?”为题写篇短文向校报投稿，表达你的看法。 注意：词数120左右； 短文题目已拟好，不计入总词数； 文中不可出现与本人相关的信息。 Mobile phones, good or bad for communication? _____________________________________________________________________________________ 本文要求就手机的利弊发表看法，话题贴近日常生活，属于话题作文。对既定的话题进行讨论，有一定的自由发挥空间，可以畅所欲言，各抒己见。在谋篇布局时要注意文章的层次，可以从三个方面着手人们对于手机两种不同看法，人们对于手机两种不同看法自己的看法。 Mobile phones, good or bad for communication? The technology of mobile phones has made many things easier for people. Someone can reach us or we can call someone wherever we are. However, people are unaware of the negative effects of mobile phones on communication. Due to the convenience of mobile phones, many people have started to engage in social interaction in person less than before. In addition, mobile phone communication lacks facial expressions and body language, without which communication becomes less personal. Consequently, some people get confused and nervous while talking to a person face to face because they mostly talk to people on mobile phones. They even do not know the manners of communication. As far as I am concerned, we should use mobile phones in a wise way and try to avoid depending too much on them. 【范文评析】 1.首段用三个句子(简单句、复合句和简单句)说明了人们对于手机的两种不同看法The technology of mobile phones has made many things easier for people”说出了手机给人们带来的方便，进而又用第二句话“Someone can reach us or we can call someone wherever we are”对此进行了阐述。接着用“However”话锋一转指出了“人们并没有意识到手机对于人们的交流带来的负面影响”的问题，为接下来的一段阐述打下了伏笔； 2.第二段承接上文分几个层面(由于手机带来的方便，人们社会活动比以前少了；手机上交流缺乏人们的面部表情和肢体语言；经常用手机交流，会给人们带来面对面交流时的障碍(困惑和紧张；甚至连交流时的礼仪In addition, Consequently, even”的使用使得文章层层推进，彰显了文章的逻辑性。“Consequently, some people get confused and nervous(get+过去分词和形容词构成高级的系表结构)while talking to a person face to face(时间状语从句的省略) because they mostly talk to people on mobile phones(原因状语从句)”似乎有点长，但体现了作者对语言的精准把握，有效的表达