大学英语四级考试作文解析完整版.pptVIP

* 大学英语四级考试作文解析 1997年12月全真试题 Directions: For this part, you are allowed 30 minutes to write a composition about Harmfulness of Fake Commodities in three paragraphs. You should write at least 100 words and you should base your composition on the outline (given in Chinese) below: 1. 目前社会上有不少假冒伪劣商品（fake commodities).为什么会有这种现象？ 2。 举例说明伪劣商品对消费者个人、社会等的危害。 布局与谋篇 写作标题和提纲对短文内容定位为假冒伪劣商品目前在社会上 流行的“现象”、“原因”、给消费者带来的“危害”及其“例证”，显然 属论说文体。 短文可按提纲自然分成两段。 第一段的要点既然是“现象”和“原因”， 可发展成因果段落。 第二段要求提供“例证”， 自然用举例法进行扩展。 第一段： 本段应发展成因果段落 果： 现象，即目前社会上有不少假冒商品 因： 需根据现象进行分析与联想 第一段提纲： TS: Fake commodities prevail because of three reason. Causes: A. economic development B. Profiteers making and selling fake commodities. C. Punishment not severe enough Effect: market swarming with fakes-food-stuff, clothing,medicine. 初 稿 （1） Fake commodities prevail in many places of our country because of three reasons. (2)Our economy is developing very fast. (3) Some profiteers try to make and sell fake commodities. (4) The punishment is not severe enough. (5) Today’s market is full of fake food-stuff, clothing, medicine and so on. 点 睛 three reasons 为主题导向， 要求以列举法发展本因果段落， 但其后行文条理性差， 段落缺乏过渡词语，连贯性欠缺。 点 石 成 金 Fake commodities prevail in many places of our country because of three reasons. First, Our economy is developing very fast. Second, some profiteers try to make and sell fake commodities. Finally, the punishment is not severe enough. Therefore, today’s market is full of fake food-stuff, clothing, medicine and so on. 点 睛 纲举则目张，尽管仅增添了四个起关联作用的词语， 段落却 从“连贯性差”升至“尚连贯”。 也就是说， 就连贯标准而言，作文 得分可提高至少一个档次。 但 first, second 这类连接词太常见， 似有平庸之感。 列举法法常用套路归纳 first, second, third,…last, finally firstly, secondly, thirdly, lastly to beg