与孩子有效沟通(二)：了解我们现在如何沟通.docVIP

TitleMore Effective Communication with Children Part 2: How we communicate now标题与孩子有效沟通（二）： 了解我们现在如何沟通AuthorRobert Najemy著作年份作者罗伯特﹒埃利亚斯﹒尼兹米翻译何伟明審閱Jenny Mui 梅凤鸣日期年月日日期年月日內文字數原文译本作者簡介字數原文译本 內文原文翻译 Let us briefly mention how most people communicate now. There are two basic categories; those who suppress themselves and do not communicate; and those who suppress the others by raising their voices, blaming and criticizing the others, ordering them around in various ways. The first group of self-suppressors eventually develops various physical and psychological problems, through the suppression of their needs, emotions and beliefs. The second group may manage to get what they want from the others, but they also cause the others to develop feelings of resentment towards them. Neither of these methods of communication is effective. What then is the alternative? There is a third possibility in which we communicate the truth and do not suppress our feelings, beliefs or needs. But we express ourselves without demeaning or blaming the other in anyway. We maintain respect for ourselves and for the other. We neither speak up to nor down towards the other, but rather directly and openly, as two mature adults, who are taking responsibility for their lives and their realities. This is absolutely essential in our communication with children. Blaming children for our unhappiness seriously undermines their self-image, self-confidence, self-worth and self-love. SELF-ANALYSIS Effective communication is not possible without a clear understanding of what we are feeling. Behind every feeling or emotion there lies a belief conscious or subconscious (usually the latter) which is causing us to have that emotion. That belief could be called a programming. What we feel is a result of what we believe about what is happening. What we believe is dependent on our childhood experiences, and conclusions. These affect how we feel in certain situations, and t