文书批改-加拿大博士申请文书批改_托福写作.docxVIP

智课网TOEFL备考资料文书批改:加拿大博士申请文书批改_托福写作 Statement of Purpose, XX, Food Science PhD Thesis。这篇SOP写得较好，前半部分内容比后半部分的好。特别是后半部分呃逆荣，注意精炼语言。另外，需要注意一些细节上的处理方式。 The Motivation and Goal。Naturescience seems charming from my childhood, and I always eager to continue myacademic study in this field to turn out my interests and curiosities intorealities。 原文： Statement of Purpose, XX, Food Science PhD / Thesis In this essay I outline my academic accomplishments and discuss my careerambitions and the motivation to pursue the graduate program in Food Scienceat the University of XX. The Motivation and Goal Naturescience seems charming from my childhood, and I always eager to continue myacademic study in this field to turn out my interests and curiosities intorealities. My father is an ichthyologist. Even though I was a child, I havebeen allowed to access the laboratory where my father and his colleagues devotemost of time to epidemic and disease prevention of aquatic animals and securityof aquatic products.（切入点很好，建议将句子做精简）I still remember that interesting period: my father heldmy hand and taught me how to use a pipette, showed me the anatomy of differentfishes and picked me to the river bank to take samples. I was inspired by theirpassions on researching then I began desiring to be a biologist and became morecurious to learning Biology in my schooling. Rightfrom my middle school days, I had chances to make more contact with the subjectof Biology. Biology allows me to explore deeper knowledge among the livingthings such as human being, animals, fungi and germs. At the high school level thoughI was exposed to only fundamentalconcepts of biology, but the introduction about cell, gene, deoxyribonucleicacid (DNA) and protein intrigued me a lot. Therefore, I usually questionedmyself as to why these molecules/components were important to organisms, howthese genetically engineered microorganisms can clean up the pollution areasand how the Polymerase Chain Reaction (PCR) technology can dete