父母强势孩子软弱 你是太强势还是太软弱？.doc

父母强势孩子软弱 你是太强势还是太软弱？ 一项最新研究显示，在谈判中，大多数人并不清楚对方如何看待自己。而人们可能要为此付出昂贵的代价。 无论是跟老板谈升职加薪，还是跟商业伙伴谈业务合作，在锱铢必较的谈判中，你认为自己表现得太强势，还是太软弱？误判有可能让你付出高昂代价。兹事体大，不得不察。… \ 怀念冯纪忠先生专栏 \ 编者按: 《第二届冯纪忠学术思想研讨会》于2010年3月下旬在北京举行，为此本刊特刊发相关文章，包括冯先生代表作方塔园及何陋轩的论述文章，缅怀冯先生的文章及最新出版的“冯纪忠讲谈录”的介绍文章。 与古为新 —— 谈方塔园规… 十大世界末日理论可能性 十大世界末日理论可能性:外星人入侵概率仅1% 目前，全球各地流传着许多关于世界末日的理论，世界末日场景也常常是一些科幻影视小说的热门话题。在所有这些理论和假想中，以2012年世界末日最为流行和着名。这些理论和假想，究竟有几分可… 一项最新研究显示，在谈判中，大多数人并不清楚对方如何看待自己。而人们可能要为此付出昂贵的代价。 无论是跟老板谈升职加薪，还是跟商业伙伴谈业务合作，在锱铢必较的谈判中，你认为自己表现得太强势，还是太软弱？误判有可能让你付出高昂代价。兹事体大，不得不察。 你是太强势还是太软弱？ “Most of us can think of someone who is unaware of how others see them,” notes Daniel Ames, a professor of management at Columbia Business School who teaches courses in negotiation. “Sadly, often enough, this research suggests that person is us.” To measure the self-awareness of people involved in negotiations, Ames and fellow researcher Abbie Wazlawek conducted four separate tests, three of them on Columbia MBA students and one on 500 U.S. adults not enrolled at the B-school. After being paired up for mock bargaining sessions over things like licensing rights, each of the MBA students answered questions about their own assertiveness and that of the person across the table. “A key question was whether people knew what their counterparts thought of them,” the study says. The results surprised even Ames, who had expected to find some differences in perception. Consider: 56% of the people described by their counterparts as too pushy believed they had come across as just right, or even a little bit too soft. Conversely, 57% of the negotiators perceived as pushovers thought they had been assertive enough, or even pushed too hard. “Together, these results suggest that people who got assertiveness wrong in the eyes of others had about a coin-flip?s chance of recognizing how they were seen,” the study says. In real-life negotiations, what Ames and Wazlawek call the “line-crossing illusion”—negotiators? belief that they