由1个水壶引发的牛人英语写作.docVIP

一封邮件 Hey Im really sorry to bother everyone but I lost my pink bottleoutside of the PJ hall or anothe place last Thursday. Thought thisbottle is not expensive, this is a gift given by a very importantperson. So if anyone has found it please please mail me on here. Thanks! 发送这样一封私人的邮件给每个人，哈~~震怒了上千大学邮箱使用者~~~当然包括这些个整天里研究理论的，所谓的 geeks!!!! 于是由教育学办公室经商讨发出这样一封回复， 地道英语，英文讽刺怎么用，这样用！！大家学学哈： Dear distraught student, First of all, I would like to?offer you my sincere condolences?for the loss of such an?important item. I understand that this is a very difficult time for you, but you must try?to be strong. I know youll get through this! Its so hard when you lose an item you?love and care for so much, but life goes on.?Im sure your pink bottle has settled?somewhere and is living its dreams.?By now, its probably on a beach somewhere, surfing?or just chilling with some ice cold beers.Please distraught student,?you must let go.?Cherish the times you had with the bottle and?enjoy the memories. If you need to discuss this issue further, then I suggest you talk?to someone at nightline maybe?Who knows, maybe one day the pink bottle will return, and the quest will be over. Until?then, we can only hope that it is safe and well.I wish you the best of luck. 面对这样的智慧型讽刺，其他系的学者们耐不住寂寞了~~好胜心作祟，于是有了这样的回复：（绝对标准的学术论文写作，包括引用非常专业！！怎么写论文，看看这个！！！）? Ms. Williams,?It is my humble opinion that?you are not taking this matter seriously enough.?On behalf of the LTPBRS?(Lost Tupperware Pink Bottle Rehabilitation Society)I would?condemn you for your lack of sympathy and understanding in this matter.There is much research to show that the loss of a Tupperware Pink Bottle (TPB) can be a?significantly?traumatic insult?and those who lose TPBs require much?counselling and?rehabilitation.?Sigg and Camelbak et al. (2010)?showed that the loss of a Tupperware Pink?Bottle has significantly greater negative psychological effects when compared to the?negative psychological effects associated with the loss