六人英语搞笑剧-孔雀东南飞.docxVIP

PAGE \* MERGEFORMAT2 六人英语搞笑剧本 孔雀东南飞Wander severy five miles 焦仲卿Johnny (Jforshort) 刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort) 焦母Johnny’s mother (JMforshort) 刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort) 太守之子Mayor’sson (MSforshort) 强盗Burglars(ABandC)  (Johnny（焦仲卿）作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪) Johnny（焦仲卿）:Everybody says that I’m henpecked,but in fact,I’m as strong as a tiger,(小声)while my wifeis Wu Song. (指着上台处的门大声道)I’m not afraid of you! (内砸出一脸盆, Johnny（焦仲卿）接住当成盾牌护着头)Then,I’m afraid of whom? My wife Lunch is the most famous woman in the neighbor-hood.She is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me.All this I do not care.I only want her to be tender than me.But she is not!Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell! (内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中Johnny（焦仲卿）) My God!Who can help me?(下) Act1 (序幕结束时,作窃听状) 焦母（JM）(拄拐棍上):I can! (对门内)Lunch!Lunch!Where are you? 刘兰芝Lunch (扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’m here!What’s up mum? 焦母（JM）:I’ve told you again and again that you should call me“my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law”. 刘兰芝 Lunch :OK.My most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law,what’s up? 焦母（JM）:Since you married my son you have behaved so badly.You have been so rude,so brusque,so lazy…… 刘兰芝 Lunch :But…… 焦母（JM）:Never interrupt me! 刘兰芝 Lunch:Never interrupt me!Since I married your son,that terrible Johnny,I have been working hard all day long,cooking and washing.I have raised ten soft housands of pigs and ducks and chicken and…… 焦母（JM）:But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson! 刘兰芝 Lunch (生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh,you want a grandson,don’t you?(开始解围裙)Goan dask your son.I’m leaving!(扯下围裙,扔在焦母（JM）的脸上,下)  Act2 (焦母（JM）坐在台上打毛线刘兰芝Luch拿着锅铲上) 刘兰芝(Luch):Mum,I’m back! 焦母（JM）:You are back?Why?What happened? 刘兰芝(Luch):I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law. 焦母（JM）(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!I have already told you!When you insisted on marrying that terrible Johnny,I told you that he is ugly stupid and poor,but you did not listen to me.Look at