TED演讲稿-20岁光阴不再(中英互译).docxVIP

When?I?was?in?my?20s,?I?saw?my?very?first?psychotherapy?client.?I?was?a?Ph.D.?student?in?clinical?psychology?at?Berkeley.?She?was?a? 26-year-old?woman?named?Alex.? 记得见我第一位心理咨询顾客时，我才20多岁。当时我是Berkeley临床心理学在读博士生。我的第一位顾客是名叫Alex的女性，26岁。 Now?Alex?walked?into?her?first?session?wearing?jeans?and?a?big?slouchy?top,?and?she?dropped?onto?the?couch?in?my?office?and?kicked?off?her? flats?and?told?me?she?was?there?to?talk?about?guy?problems.?Now?when?I?heard?this,?I?was?so?relieved.?My?classmate?got?an?arsonist?for?her? first?client.?(Laughter)?And?I?got?a?twentysomething?who?wanted?to? talk?about?boys.?This?I?thought?I?could?handle.? 第一次见面Alex穿着牛仔裤和宽松上衣走进来，她一下子栽进我办公室的沙发上，踢掉脚上的平底鞋，跟我说她想谈谈男生的问题。当时我听到这个之后松了一口气。因为我同学的第一个顾客是纵火犯，而我的顾客却是一个20出头想谈谈男生的女孩。我觉得我可以搞定。? But?I?didnt?handle?it.?With?the?funny?stories?that?Alex?would?bring?to? session,?it?was?easy?for?me?just?to?nod?my?head?while?we?kicked?the can?down?the?road. 但是我没有搞定。Alex不断地讲有趣的事情，而我只能简单地点头认同她所说的，很自然地就陷入了附和的状态。 Thirtys?the?new?20,?Alex?would?say,?and?as?far?as?I?could?tell,?she? was?right.?Work?happened?later,?marriage?happened?later,?kids? happened?later,?even?death?happened?later.?Twentysomethings?like? Alex?and?I?had?nothing?but?time.? Alex说：“30岁是一个新的20岁”。没错，我告诉她“你是对的”。工作还早，结婚还早，生孩子还早，甚至死亡也早着呢。像Alex和我这样20多岁的人，什么都没有但时间多的是。? But?before?long,?my?supervisor?pushed?me?to?push?Alex?about?her?love?life.?I?pushed?back.?I?said,?Sure,?shes?dating?down,?shes?sleeping?witha?knucklehead,?but?its?not?like?shes?going?to?marry?the?guy.?And? then?my?supervisor?said,?Not?yet,?but?she?might?marry?the?next?one.? Besides,?the?best?time?to?work?on?Alexs?marriage?is?before?she?has?one.?? 但不久之后，我的导师就要我向Alex的感情生活施压。我反驳说：“当然她现在正在和别人交往，她现在和一个傻瓜男生睡觉，但看样子她不会和他结婚的。”?而我的导师说：“不着急，她也许会和下一个结婚。但修复Alex婚姻的最好时期是她还没拥有婚姻的时期。”? Thats?what?psychologists?call?an?Aha!?moment.?That?was?the? moment?I?realized,?30?is?not?the?new?20.?Yes,?people?settle?down?later than they used to, but that didn’t make Alex’s 20s a developmental downtime. 这就是心理学家说的“顿悟时刻”。正是那个时候我意识到，30岁不是