简单英语幽默小故事欣赏.docxVIP

简单英语幽默小故事欣赏 At 2 a. m. Mrs. Culkin was convinced that she had heard a prowler in the living-room. Tiptoe down-stairs, she told her husband, Don t turn on the lights. Sneak up him before he knows whats happening.Dutifully Mr. Culkin put on his robe. Just as he reached the bedroom door, his wife added, And when you come back, bring me a glass of milk. 半夜两点，科尔肯太太确信听到客厅有贼，便对丈夫说：“别开灯，蹑手蹑脚下楼，别让贼发觉，悄悄靠近他。” 科尔肯先生披上外套，责无旁贷地去捉贼。刚走到卧室门口，他妻子又补充说：“回来时给我捎杯牛奶。” No matter which girls he brought home, the young man found disapproval from his mother. Afriend gave him advice.Find a girl just like your mother -- then, shes bound to like her.　　Sothe young man searched and searched, and finally found the girl. He told his friendlyadviser:Just like you said, I found a girl who looked, talked, dressed, and even cooked likemother, And just as you said, mother liked her.　　So, asked the friend, whathappened?Nothing, said the young man. My father hates her!. 有个小伙子发现，无论他带什么女孩子回家，妈妈都不赞成。一位朋友建议他，“你找一个像你母亲一样的女孩吧——你母亲肯定会喜欢她的”。这个小伙子就找啊找啊，终于找到了一个女孩。他告诉自己的朋友：“就像你说的，我找到了一个女孩，无论在感觉、说话、打扮，甚至烹饪手艺都很像母亲的，而且真的像你说的那样，妈妈很喜欢她。”“那么，”他的朋友问到，“发生了什么事?”“没事，”小伙子说，我父亲很讨厌她!” Bernie was invited to his friends home for dinner. Morris, the host, preceded every request tohis wife by endearing terms, calling her Honey, My Love, Darling, Sweetheart, etc.　伯尼被邀请到朋友家吃晚餐。莫里斯，也是请客的主人，在每个客人面前都称他的妻子为亲爱的、我的爱人、甜心等等。 Bernie looked at Morris and remarked, That is really nice, that after all these years that youhave been married, and you keep calling your wife those pet names. Morris hung his head andwhispered, To tell the truth, I forgot her name three years ago. 伯尼于是对莫里斯说：“你真是很好，结婚这么多年后，你还是喊你妻子这么甜蜜的名字。”莫里斯则弯下腰来对伯尼轻声说：“告诉你实情吧，我3年前就忘记她的名字了。” When my printers type began to go faint, I called a repair shop where a friendly man told me that the printer probably needed only to be cleaned. 由于我的打印机不能打印出清晰的字来，我就打电话给维修部。电话是一位非常和蔼的男人接的，他说我的打印机也许只是需要清理一下。 Because the shop