2013高中英语阅读素材：Why we love who we love 打破砂锅爱到底.docVIP

Why we love who we love 打破砂锅爱到底 真的有一见钟情这回事吗？为什么没有呢？当爱情来了的时候，那一刻无论如何，情侣们总会找到他们相互惺惺相惜之处。这也许就像他们都曾经读过同一本书，都在一个镇上出生一样平常。同时，他们又会看到双方性格上的互补。Have you ever known a married couple that just didnt seem as though they should fit together -- yet they are both happy in the marriage, and you cant figure out why?I know of one couple: He is a burly ex-athlete who, in addition to being a successful salesman, coaches Little League, is active in his Rotary Club and plays golf every Saturday with friends. Meanwhile, his wife is petite, quiet and a complete Homebody. She doesnt even like to go out to dinner.What mysterious force drives us into the arms of one person, while pushing us away from another who might appear equally desirable to any unbiased observer?Of the many factors influencing our idea of the perfect mate, one of the most telling, according to John Money, professor emeritus of medical psychology and pediatrics at Johns Hopkins University, is what he calls our love map -- a group of messages encoded in our brains that describes our likes and dislikes. It shows our preferences in hair and eye color, in voice, smell, and body build. It also records the kind of personality that appeals to us, whether its the warm and friendly type or the strong, silent type.In short, we fall for and pursue those people who most clearly fit our love map. And this love map is largely determined in childhood. By age eight, the pattern for our ideal mate has already begun to float around in our brains.When I lecture, I often ask couples in the audience what drew them to their dates or mates. Answers range from Shes strong and independent and I go for redheads to I love his sense of humor and That crooked smile, thats what did it.Robert Winch, a longtime sociology professor at Northwestern University, stated in his research that our choice of a marriage partner involves a number of social similarities. But he also maintained that we look for someone with complementary needs. A talker