I failed to make the chess team because of my height.doc

If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.Edsger Dijkstra Where there is no patrol car, there is no speed limit.Peter Beckmann. For NASA, space is still a high priority. Dan Quayle 5/9/90 Base eight is just like base ten really, if youre missing two fingers.Tom Lehrer Remember, if you smoke after sex youre doing it too fast.Woody Allen Sometimes I lie awake at night, and I ask, Where have I gone wrong? Then a voice says to me, This is going to take more than one night. Charlie Brown. Food is an important part of a balanced diet.Fran Lebowitz Electricity is really just organized lightning.George Carlin Politics is supposed be the second oldest profession. I have come to realise that it bears a very close resemblance to the first.Ronald Reagan. The Holocaust was an obscene period in our nations history. I mean in this centurys history. But we all lived in this century. I didnt live in this century.Dan Quayle 15/9/88 The Internet is a gateway to get on the net. Bob Dole. Sarah Brightman couldnt act scared on the New York subway at 4 oclock in the morning.Joel Segal. What other culture could have produced someone like Hemmingway and not seen the joke?Gore Vidal. This Halloween the most popular mask is the Arnold Schwarzenegger mask. And the best part? With a mouth full of candy you will sound just like him.Conan OBrien. You can tell German wine from vinegar by the label. Mark Twain I dont think anyone should write their autobiography until after theyre dead.Samuel Goldwyn An acquaintance is someone we know well enough to borrow from but not enough to lend to.Ambrose Bierce Son, a woman is like a beer. They smell good, they look good, youd step over your own mother just to get one! But you cant stop at one. You wanna drink another woman!Homer Simpson Louis Pasteurs theory of germs is ridiculous fiction. Pierre Pachet, Professor of Physiology at Toulouse, 1872 . I stopped believing in Santa Cla