I和体育项目有关的幽默.docVIP

1．Agnes:?My?poor?friend?Lena?has?spent?her?whole?life?chasing?men.?Abigail:?Did?she?ever?catch?one??Agnes:?No,?but?she’s?personally?responsibly?for?several?men?qualifying?for?the?Olympic?track?team.?Agnes：我可怜的朋友Lena一辈子都在追逐男人。?Abigail：她追上过吗？?Agnes：没有，但她个人要对几个有资格参加奥林匹克竞赛队的男人负责。??2．Mega:?How?do?you?like?riding?school??Julie:?It’s?great!?My?horse?is?very?polite.?Megan:?A?polite?horse!?What?do?you?mean??Julie:?Whenever?we?come?to?a?jump,?he?lets?me?go?first.?Mega：你觉骑术学校怎么样？Julie：非常棒，我的马非常有礼貌。Mega：马有礼貌！你是什么意思？Julie：每次我们来到跳跃（栏）时，它都让我先走。??3．Sam:?A?funny?thing?happened?to?me?today.?I?was?at?the?racetrack?and?bent?over?to?tie?my?shoe,?when?some?nearsighted?jockey?strapped?saddle?on?my?back.?Tom:?Astonishing!?What?did?you?do??Sam:?What?could?I?do??I?ran?the?best?race?I?could?and?came?the?third.?Sam：今天一件奇怪的事情发生在我身上，我在赛马跑道上弯腰系鞋带时，一个眼睛近视的骑师把马鞍子绑到了我背上。?Tom：真是让人称奇！你怎么做的？?Sam：我能做什么？我尽我所能跑了我最好的一场比赛，得了个第三。??4．Annie:?Why?are?you?running??Danny:?I’m?trying?to?prevent?a?fight.?Annie:?Between?whom??Danny:?Between?me?and?that?bully?chasing?me.?Annie：你为什么跑？Danny：我在设法阻止一场殴斗。Annie：谁跟谁呢？Danny：我和追我的那个流氓。??5．Horse?owner:?This?horse?is?eight-years-?old?and?he’s?never?raced?before.?Jockey:?How?come??Horse?Owner:?Well,?we?couldn’t?catch?him?until?he?was?seven.?马主：这匹马8岁了，他以前从来没有参加过比赛。职业骑师：怎么会呢??马主：它7岁以前我们抓不住它。?6．Driver?number?1:?Every?time?you?race?around?one?of?those?sharp?curves?when?you’re?driving,?I?get?scared.?Driver?number?2:?Then?why?don’t?you?do?what?I?do?and?close?your?eyes??司机1：你开车每次急转弯时我都吓死了。司机2：为什么你不和我一样闭上眼睛呢???7．I’m?delighted?to?find?after?all?these?years?that?my?tennis?game?has?not?deteriorated.?It’s?just?as?bad?as?before.?我很高兴这些年我的网球技术没有退化，还象以前那么臭。??8．家庭主妇：喂，Acme水暖部吗？赶紧过来，我家地下室水哗哗地漏！?Acme：对不起，我们要至少两天才能过去。?主妇：两天！我这段时间怎么办呢？?Acme：想法教孩子们游泳。?Housewife:?Hello,?Acme?Plumbing??Come?quick,?I’ve?got?a?huge?leak?in?the?basement!?Acme:?Sorry,?we?can’t?get?there?for?at?least?two?days.?Housewife:?Two?days!?What’ll?I?do?in?the?meantime??Ac