关于英语小笑话演讲稿.docxVIP

关于英语小笑话演讲稿 骄傲的老爸 The concerned father was puzzled because his sons grades had been dropping steadily whilehe was at college, 一位关心儿子的老爸对于念大学的儿子成绩每况愈下一直想不懂， so he called the dean to find out what was wrong. 因此他拜访了学院的院长，想了解究竟问题在哪里。 Well, sir, replied the dean, who always tried to be diplomatic, 说话总是讲求圆滑的院长回答说： Ive got some good news and some bad news. “先生，我有好消息和坏消息要告诉你。 The bad news is that your sons become the most flagrant homosexual on campus, 坏消息是令郎乃是闻名校内的同性恋者， and spends all his time chasing after the lads on the football and basketball teams. 他成天只知道追求足球队和篮球队的男孩子。 My God, thats horrible! “我的老天爷，太可怕了!” But the good news is hes just been elected Queen of the Homecoming Parade ! “但好消息是他刚被选为欢迎球队返校游行的皇后!” The woman was reading the newspaper as she and her husband were eating breakfast. 一位女士和她先生正在用早餐，她边吃边看报纸。 Did you hear about this, dear? she asked. “亲爱的，你听过这则新闻吗?”她问道。 It seems a man traded his wife for season tickets to the Spurs. “似乎是一个男的为了看马刺队的比赛，用他太太跟人换了球季的门票。 You wouldnt do a thing like that, would you, sweetheart? 你不会那么做吧，亲爱的?” No way, answered the husband. “我才不会那么傻呢!”先生答道。 The seasons almost half over. “今年球季几乎都过了一大半了. Two women friends were having tea. 两个女人正在喝茶， Said one to the other, 其中一位对另一位说道： Ive been trying to reach my lawyer for a week ... “我已经花了一个礼拜找我的律师...” Oh, please dont mention lawyers to me interrupted the recent widow, “哦，拜托别再向我提律师的事了，”那位刚死去丈夫的女人插嘴道， Ive had so much trouble settling my husbands estate that I sometimes wish he hadnt died! “我在处理我先生遗留的房地产时遭遇到好多麻烦，有时候我真希望他没死就好了。 感谢您的阅读，祝您生活愉快。