初中幽默英语小故事.docxVIP

初中幽默英语小故事 1：不要动 A friend of mine was giving an important dinner party for her husbands business associates. She put guest towels and soap in the bathroom, and, not wanting her teenagers to use them first, attached warning notes that read:Use these, Ill kill you. When the guests left after a successful evening, she went into the bathroom and xiaogushi8 found towels and soap untouched…with her warning notes still on them. 我的一位朋友为他丈夫举办了一次很重要的业务往来交往招待会。 他把客人用的毛巾、香皂都放在洗澡间。为了不让她的小孩们先把这些东西用了，她在上面贴了张条子。上面写着：用一下，我就杀了你们。 当客人们度过一个很愉快的晚上满意而去后，她来到洗澡间，发现毛巾和香皂都无人用过…因为她贴的条子还在上面。 2：真情 We were leaving a football game in a throng of people. My husband, who never displays affection in public, took my hand. I has delighted. As we walked hand in hand out of the stadium. I looked up at him, smiling, and asked, You dont want to lose me? No, he said. I dont want to look for you. 我们和一大群人在橄榄球比赛散场时纷纷撤离比赛场。 我那位从未在大庭广众之下流露感情的丈夫这时拉住了我的手，我非常高兴。当我们手拉手往体育场外走时，我抬着头看着他并笑着问：“你不想失去我，对吗?” 丈夫回答道：“不是，我只是不想去找你。” 3：受欢迎的听众 One afternoon while I was talking to a professor, my two-year-old daughter Melissa, wandered into a nearby classroom. There was a math class in progress and, to my dismay, Melissa sat down in the front row. When I went in to get her, the instructor stopped me. Young lady, he said, I have been teaching calculus at this college for over 20 years. Not once in that time has anyone come to my class just because he or she wanted to. The child may stay. 一天下午，在我和一位教授说话的时候，我两岁的女儿玛丽莎转到了附近的一个教室里。那儿正在上数学课。更糟的是玛丽莎还居然坐在了前排的座位上。 当我走进去想把她抱出来时，上课的教授拦住了我。她说：“这位女士，我在这所大学里已经教了20多年的微积分。在这期间从未有人是出于自愿来到我的课堂，这个孩子可以呆在这里。” 4：禽以毛聚 An American tourist was lunching in a restaurant in China, whose specialty was roast duck. The waiter explained each dish as he brought it to the table: This is the breast of the duck. This is the leg of the duck. This is the wing of the duck… Then came a dish that the American knew was chicken. He waite