孔雀东南飞(英语话剧剧本).docVIP

英语搞笑话剧《孔雀东南飞》 焦仲卿Johnny(Jforshort)—刘兰芝Lunch(Lforshort)— 焦母Johnny’smother(JMforshort)—刘母Lunch’smother(LMforshort)— 太守之子Mayor’sson(MSforshort)强盗Burglars(ABandC) (J作被打状跑上台,内砸出一卷纸筒,J被打中,狼狈不堪) J: Everybodysays that I’m henpecked, but in fact , I’m as strong as a tiger,(小声)whilemy wife is Wu Song. (指着上台处的门大声道)I’m not afraid ofyou! (内砸出一脸盆,J接住当成盾牌护着头)Then, I’mafraid of whom? My wife Lunch is the most famous woman in the neighborhood. She is braver than me, smarter than me and stronger than me. All this I do not care. I only want her to etender than me. But she is not! Having a wife like this is just like living in the hell! (内又砸出一卷纸筒,击中J) My God ! Who can help me?(下) Act1 (序幕结束时,JM作窃听状) JM(拄拐棍上):I can! (对门内)Lunch! Lunch! Where are you? L(扎着围裙,拿着锅铲,从门内跳出来):I’m here! What’sup mum? JM: I’ve told you again and again that you should call me“ my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law”. L:OK .My most beautiful graceful and dearest mother-in-law, what’s up? JM: Since you married my son you have been so badly .You have been so rude , so brusque , and so lazy…… L: But…… JM: Never interrupt me! L: Never interrupt me ! Since I married your son ,that terrible Johnny ,I have been working hard all day long, cooking and washing. I have raised ten pigs and ducks and chicken and…… JM: But all those you have done are not as valuable as a grandson! L(生气地挥动着锅铲):Oh, you want a grandson, don’t you?(开始解围裙)Go and ask your son .I’m leaving! (扯下围裙,扔在JM的脸上,下) Act2 (LM坐在台上打毛线,L拿着锅铲上) L:Mum, I’m back! LM: You are back? Why? What happened? L:I was kicked out by my most beautiful graceful and dearest mother–in-law. LM(惊讶,但随即露出幸灾乐祸的神情):See!I have already told you! When you married Johnny, I have told you that he is ugly stupid and poor man ,but you did’t listen to me .Look at yourself…… L :But, mum…… LM: Never interrupt me! L: Mum, I’m not interruping you .