Why We Lov Who We Love.docVIP

Why We Love Who We Love 我们为什么相爱 The real reasons why we choose that special someone. 为什么我们选择这个人的真正原因 By Dr. Joyce Brothers Your Parents Influence 你父母的影响 Have you ever known a married couple that just didnt seem as though they should 你曾经知道一对看上去不应该适合对方， fit together -- yet they are both happy in the marriage, and you cant figure out why? 然而却都以这个婚姻为幸福的结婚夫妻吗，你能猜测出这是为什么吗？I know of one couple: He is a burly ex-athlete who, in addition to being a successful 我知道这样一对夫妻：丈夫结实粗壮，每周六会和朋友去他的扶轮社活动和打高尔夫， salesman, coaches Little League, is active in his Rotary Club and plays golf every 训练少年棒球联合会, 另外还是一个成功的销售员。 Saturday with friends. Meanwhile, his wife is petite, quiet and a complete homebody 然而同时，他的妻子是一个娇小，安静的宅女 She doesnt even like to go out to dinner. 她甚至不喜欢出去吃饭。 What mysterious force drives us into the arms of one person, while pushing us away 是什么神秘的力量驱使我们进入一个人的生活，当我们拒绝另外一个 from another who might appear equally desirable to any unbiased observer? 在任何公平的旁观者看来可能同样令人满意的人？Of the many factors influencing our idea of the perfect mate, one of the most telling, according to John Money, professor emeritus of medical psychology and pediatrics at Johns Hopkins University, is what he calls our love map -- a group of messages encoded in our brains that describes our likes and dislikes. 根据名誉退休的医学心理学家，兼美国约翰霍普金斯大学儿科教授John Money所说，在影响我们决定完美伴侣的众多因素中，其中最重要的是一种被他称为“爱图”的东西，那是一组在大脑中用于描述我们喜欢或不喜欢的信息编码。 It shows our preferences in hair and eye color, in voice, smell, body build. It also records the kind of personality that appeals to us, whether its the warm and friendly type or the strong, silent type. 它显示我们在头发、眼睛的颜色、在声音、香味、身材上的偏爱。它还记录吸引我们的各种品格类型是否是温暖友好的风格还是热情的风格，亦或是沉默的风格。In short, we fall for and pursue those people who most clearly fit our love map. And this love map is largely determined in childhood. By age eight, the pattern for our ideal mate has already begun to float around in our brains. 简言之，我们迷恋和纠缠那些最明显的符合我们的爱图的人。而且这种爱图在童年时期对我们有最主要的决定作用。在8岁时，对于我们理想的伴侣已经开始在大脑中有了大约的模型。When I l