异地恋注意事项（Long-distance love matters needing attention）.docVIP

异地恋注意事项（Long-distance love matters needing attention） 统计地讲，异地恋（爱的距离）分手的概率远远大于想处一地的恋人。尤其是双方都在20岁以下的异地恋，绝大多数以失败告终。 对于异地恋的研究很多，一个最重要的问题是，保持怎么样的联系强度和什么样的心态，可以比较好地维持一段异地恋情。一个直观的想法是，越是紧密的联系，感情应该越牢固。事实真的如此吗？大规模的调查发现，中等强度的联系，每天半小时到一小时，最有利于长期保持异地恋；反过来，高强度的联系，例如每天超过2小时的电话或网络即时通讯并不利于恋情的持续尽管上面的调查还有争议，但是至少没有可信的证据说明高强度联系具有正面的意义。 斯滕伯格在1988年提出了三角爱情理论，认为完美的爱情同时包括三个方面：受激情引导，身体（性）唤醒为标志的激情之爱；以互相欣赏的性格，情趣，认知和判断力为基础的，亲密持久的友谊；经由承诺和责任支撑的相互关系。为了简化，以后分别叫做激情，亲密和承诺。只有亲密和激情的是浪漫之爱；只有激情和承诺的是愚昧之爱；只有亲密和承诺的是伴侣之爱。如果只有激情，则是迷恋；如果只有承诺，则是空爱；如果只有亲密，则是友情。 最近，这套简单的理论被用来解释异地恋的一些行为。 首先， By filling out a complex love scale, you can accurately assess your partners current emotional status. Zick Rubin through the University of Michigan student survey found that the degree of eye and physical contact between partners can be accurately used to predict their performance on the survey scale. In other words, a partner in a passion (passion, love, dominance) has significantly more eye and physical contact than other partners (inadvertently). Hatfield is a direct definition of passion as a state of intense desire to be with each other. If a long-distance lover demands a higher level of romantic passion (and can be measured by a scale), he or she will be in conflict. The Meyer survey found that these are strong desire and the other with lovers usually have a longer talk time (Meyer investigation involves only the phone), and often at the end of the conversation process and frustration - he / she wants to hear a familiar voice, to find a familiar feeling, but no. In fact, I think the reason is that what he / she really desires is taste (body arousal) rather than sound (spiritual arousal). In turn, can overcome the long-term off-site separation and finally into the marriage hall, often have the following two characteristics: first, the lover has spent the love period, the emotion has been more and more attention to the development of the spirit of the object, the two sides have more exchanges in the spirit level; second is