分离焦虑症说声再见不容易.doc

成人分离焦虑症:说声再见不容易 Last week, when his wife left home for a two-week cruise with her best friend, Robert Sollars stocked up on hamburger meat and peanut butter, then settled into a weekend of football on cable TV. And he cried. 上个月，罗伯特?索拉斯（Robert Sollars）的妻子和她最好的朋友出去参加为期两周的游艇游。索拉斯于是买了一堆汉堡肉和花生酱，整个周末都泡在电视前面看橄榄球赛。而且他还哭了。 Mr. Sollars, 51 years old, who owns a workplace-security consulting firm in Mesa, Ariz., hates being away from his wife even when she is just going to work, as an intensive-care nurse on the night shift at a local hospital. When she is away for a longer stretch, Mr. Sollars feels nauseated and finds it hard to concentrate. 51岁的索拉斯在亚利桑那州梅萨（Mesa）拥有一家工作场所安全咨询公司，他妻子是当地一家医院的重症监护护士。索拉斯痛恨离开妻子──即使她只是去医院上夜班。当她长时间离开时，索拉斯会感觉恶心，而且很难集中注意力。 As his wife packed for vacation, he hovered anxiously. She eventually snapped, and they argued for hours, he says. That night, after shed gone to the airport, Mr. Sollars couldnt sleep. Among his thoughts: She will have a car accident. She will get sick or hurt. She will find someone else. I firmly believe that my worry is based in fantasy land, Mr. Sollars says. But I am still deathly afraid of losing the woman I love. 当他妻子打包准备去度假时，他坐立不安。他说，她最终生气了，两人吵了几小时。那晚，当她去机场后，索拉斯无法入睡。他心里想着：她会遇到车祸。她会生病或受伤。她会有外遇。索拉斯说，“我坚信，我的担心完全是无中生有。但我仍然非常担心失去我爱的女人。” To most people, separation anxiety is what young children feel while crying on the first day of preschool. But adults also can experience it when they are separated from the people who matter most to them. They may be unable to contain their worry and end up pushing away the very person they need so desperately. 对多数人来说，“分离焦虑”是小孩子在第一天上幼儿园哭哭啼啼时的感受。但成年人与他们最在乎的人分离时，也可能体会到这种焦虑。他们可能无法抑制自己的担忧，最终导致他们如此亟需的那个人远离他们。 Youd think pining for someone would be rare at a time when everyone is hyperconnected. But all this effortless connectivity has spoiled us. We expect to be able to reach everyone immediately, and when we cant, were losing the ability to cope. 阿尔瓦雷斯（右）与她的两个女儿在得克萨斯州奥斯汀的寄宿学校。你会认为，在如今这个每个人都彼此“超连通”的时代