佳译 汉译英常见拙译 翻译.doc

所谓contraction即a word, as won’t from will not, or phrase, as o’clock from of the clock,formed by omitting or combining some of the sounds of a longer phrase。Contraction貌似小事，在英译中却频繁出现！似乎这是一种既方便又简约的表达方式。然而，从美国教授的评改中，我们忽然醒悟：在正式文体中，不要使用缩写式！1.在我的集邮册中，有一张邮票占据了最显著的位置。原译：I’ve a stamp in the most conspicuous place of my album.改译：I have a stamp in the most conspicuous place of my album.小析：No contractions in formal essays.2.我对担任教师工作充满了期待。原译：I’m filled with the anticipation of standing on the teaching role.改译：I am filled with the anticipation of standing in the teaching role.3.别人觉得这是在浪费时间，我觉得这可是个好办法。原译：…others think it’s a waste of time. But I think it’s a good system.改译：…others think it is a waste of time. But I think it is a good system.小析：This is supposed to be a formal essay. Do not use any contractions. 三、搭配（collocation）“搭配”，是一个非常重要的语言概念。英语尤其讲究“搭配”。搭配意识，实际上体现了学生掌握词汇的深度。很多时候，学生只是粗浅地孤立地记住了单词的中文释义，英译时生搬硬套对应的中文的搭配方式，而不知应当“整块记忆”，甚至以句型，或固定表达的形式记忆“孤立”的单词。汉语也讲究“搭配”，遗憾的是，目前传统的表达正在受到冲击。如：电视剧《男人没有烦恼》的主题歌：“走出那沉甸的从前…”。按照“沉甸”的减缩法，“黑压压”就是“黑压”、“兴冲冲”就可以减缩成“兴冲”了。电视剧《我想有个家》主题歌《牵手梦缘》，歌名和歌中“你我牵手梦能缘”的“缘”字，都是“圆”的错别字，而歌中反复吟唱的一句“好人都祝好人的你，愿天下人一路平安”，前句宾语残缺，如果与后句构成复句，主语又混乱不明。1.学生们很悠闲地坐在绿茵茵的草坪上，用吉他在弹奏浪漫的歌曲，有的漫步在树木夹道的通道上，尽情谈笑。原译??The students are sitting leisurely on the green lawn, playing guitars with romanticsongs or walking in the tree-lined passages, talking and laughing heartily.改译：The students are sitting leisurely on the green lawn, playing romantic songs on theguitar, or walking along the tree-lined pathways, talking and laughing heartily.小析：“在乐器上弹奏…乐曲”的习惯表达是play…on the (guitar), 此外，walking in the tree-lined passages也不符合习惯表达。2.你不相信吗？那你就试试吧。（kylepluto按：原文没有“那”字，不过我觉得不顺口，就加上了。还有就是，原文的例子是一路排序下来，从1到41，我觉得看着不舒服，打字的时候就按照标题给例子重新编了号。）原译：Don’t you believe? Just try!改译：Don’t you believe me? Just try it!小析：We only use believe intransitively when we talking about beliefs accepted across theculture and by most people. If we talk about God, the rule of