英语小笑话!~.docVIP

搞笑英语短文 Good Boy Little Robert asked his mother for two cents. What did you do with the money I gave you yesterday? I gave it to a poor old woman, he answered. Youre a good boy, said the mother proudly. Here are two cents more. But why are you so interested in the old woman? She is the one who sells the candy.  好孩子 小罗伯特向妈妈要两分钱。 “昨天给你的钱干什么了？” “我给了一个可怜的老太婆，”他回答说。 “你真是个好孩子，”妈妈骄傲地说。“再给你两分钱。可你为什么对那位老太太那么感兴趣呢？” “她是个卖糖果的。” Ive Just Bitten My Tongue Are we poisonous? the young snake asked his mother. Yes, dear, she replied - Why do you ask? Cause Ive just bitten my tongue!  我刚咬破自己的舌头 “我们有毒吗？”一个年幼的蛇问它的母亲。 “是的，亲爱的，”她回答说，“你问这个干什么？” “因为我刚刚咬破自己的舌头。” Fathers Things When Tom Howard was seventeen years old he was as tall as his father, so he began to borrow Mr. Howards clothes when he wanted to go out with his friends in the evening. Mr. Howard did not like this, and he always got very angry when he found his son wearing any of his things. One evening when Tom came downstairs to go out, his father stopped him in the hall. He looked at Toms clothes very carefully. Then he said angrily, Isnt that one of my ties, Tom? Yes, Father, it is, answered Tom. And that shirts mine too. Yes, thats yours too, answered Tom. And youre wearing my belt! said Mr. Howard. Yes, I am, Father, answered Tom. You dont want your trousers to fall down, do you?  父亲的东西 汤姆.霍德华十七岁的时候，长得和父亲一样高了，于是当他晚上和朋友一起出去时，就开始借父亲的衣服穿。 霍德华先生可不喜欢这样，当他发现他的儿子穿他的衣服时，总是非常生气。 一天晚上，汤姆下楼准备出去，父亲在门厅里拦住了他。他细细打量着汤姆的穿着。 然后他气呼呼地说：“汤姆，那不是我的一条领带吗？” 汤姆回答说：“是的，父亲，是你的领带。” “还有那衬衫也是我的。” “是的，衬衫也是你的。”汤姆回答说。 “还有呢，你连皮带也用我的。”霍德华先生说。 “是的，父亲，”汤姆回答说，“你不愿意让你的裤子掉下来吧？” Sleeping Pills Bob was having trouble getting to sleep at night. He went to see his doctor, who prescribed some extra-strong sleeping pills. Sunday night Bob took the pills, slept well and was awake before he heard the alarm. He took his time getting to the of