焦虑控制狂八大特征.docVIP

焦虑控制狂的八大特征 摘要：你的控制狂行为已经让你身边的人抓狂了，而你很可能毫不自知!这篇文章将告诉你如何减轻症状。 　　You might not know it, but your controlling behaviors are making people around you batty. Here are a few ways to ease up already. 　　你的控制狂行为已经让你身边的人抓狂了，而你很可能毫不自知!这篇文章将告诉你如何减轻症状。 　　Control freaks rarely know that they are one. They believe that they are helping people with their constructive criticism or taking over a project because no one else will do it right. They dont see their controlling behaviors as symptoms of whats really going on--their own anxiety has run amuck. 　　首先，控制狂们通常不知道自己是控制狂。他们认为自己提出“建设性意见”或干脆直接把别人的活儿揽过来做，全是因为“别人没法胜任”，而自己是在好心帮忙。然而他们却完全忽略了自己真实表现出来的症状——极度焦虑。 　　Irrational thoughts abound in our high stress world: If I dont get this contract, Ill get fired. If Im not home by 6:00, Im a terrible parent. If I dont get that raise, I suck at my job. All of these thoughts might be true, but probably not. 　　当人极度紧张时，他的脑子里会填满了荒唐的想法，比如：如果我谈不成这笔单子，我就会被解雇;如果我晚6点还没到家，我就是个不称职的家长;如果我没得到那个加薪机会，说明我的工作表现烂极了。这些想法中，有些的确可能发生，有些毫无根据。 　　Rather than tackle our own irrational thinking and massage it into more realistic thinking, we attempt to control the situation, usually by trying to control other /zx/143.html people. Want to know if youre a control freak? Here are eight signs for your self-diagnosing pleasure. 　　为了不让糟糕的假设变成现实，我们得试着去控制局面。如何控制呢?通常的做法是：控制别人。想知道自己是不是不知不觉中成了控制狂?看看以下8大特点中，自己占了几项吧。 　　1. You believe that if someone would change one or two things about themselves, youd be happier. So you try to help them change this behavior by pointing it out, usually over and over. 　　你一直觉得如果别人能改掉一两个缺点的话，你就会活得更开心。于是，你一遍又一遍地指出他们的缺点，以“帮助”他们改正。 　　2. You micromanage others to make them fit your (often unrealistic) expectations. You dont believe in imperfection and you dont think anyone else should either. 　　你事无巨细地改变他人，以达到自己心目中的最高(不现实的)期望。你从来不相信“不完美”的存在，同样地，你要求周遭的人也得摒弃那些不完美。 　　3. You judge others behavior as right or wrong and passive-aggressively withhold attention until they fall in line with your expectations