搞笑英语小故事大全.docxVIP

搞笑英语小故事大全 借口 Knowing my husbands habit of sampling everything I bake，I left a note on a dozen mince tarts reading:Counted—one dozen.When I returned，two tarts had disappeared, and the note had been altered to read:Think metric.” 我丈夫有个习惯，凡是我烧烤的东西，他都要认真检查清点。一次，我做了12个馅饼。临走，我在旁边留了个条子，“已数好—一打.”等我回来时，我发现少了两个饼，而且条子上多了一行字:“按公制法计算。” 成熟的年龄 When my great-grandfather became a centenarian，a newspaper reporter asked him how he felt. Fine，Grandpa replied. In fact，I get around better now than I did a hundred years ago.” 我曾祖父百岁的时侯，一位记者问他感受如何。“很好，”曾祖父说:“事实上，我现在的活动范围要比一百年前大多了。” 直言不讳 My husband bought me an automatic dishwasher for my birthday. In filling out the guarantee，he came across the question，“What year and model dishwasher did youre place?He wrote:Wife—Age 24. 我丈夫在我生日那天给我买了台全自动洗碗机。在填写保修单叶，他看到里面有一项是:“你替换的旧洗碗机是哪年生产的，什么型号?”我丈夫写道:“妻子—24岁”。 梦幻世界 A hotel manager in a small town reports that a guest woke up everyone in the hotel screaming，Its in the phone book! Its in the the phone book! 饭店经理报告说一名客人把所有的人都吵醒了，他不停地尖叫:“就在电话薄里，就在电话薄里。” The manager got the house detective and they let themselves into the mans room，where they found him in the midst of a nightmare. I was having a horrible dream，”the man explained when awakened. I dreamed the income-tax people wanted to send me a big refund, but theyd lost my address! 经理找来侦探后，带他进入了那位客人的房间。原来，那位客人是在做梦。“我做了个非常可怕的梦，”那人醒后解释说:“我梦见收税人想寄退给我一笔钱，但他们把我的地址给丢了.” 跑道已清 An airline ticket agent was being given a particularly rough time by a woman who complained about the departure times. She said，“Young man，I could stick a feather in my ear and get there faster. 当一位飞机售票员也够例霉的。一位妇女在向他抱怨飞机起飞得太晚，这位售票员真不知如何是好。那位妇女说:“年较人，如果我能在我的耳朵土播上羽毛，我都会比你们的飞机先到那儿。” Madam,replied the agent calmly,the runways are clear. “好啊售票员平静地说:“现在我们的飞机跑这正空着呢。” 感谢您的阅读，祝您生活愉快。