英语幽默笑话精选.pdfVIP

中大英才 英语幽默笑话精选 I Wasnt Asleep When a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. The conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: Wake up, sir! I wasnt asleep, the man answered. Not asleep? But you had your eyes closed. I know. I just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car. 我没有睡着 当一群妇女上车之后，车上的座位全都被占满了。售票员注意到一名男子好象是睡着了， 他担心这个人会坐过站，就用肘轻轻地碰了碰他，说：“先生，醒醒！” “我没有睡着。”那个男人回答。 “没睡着？可是你眼睛都闭上了呀？” “我知道，我只是不愿意看到在拥挤的车上有女士站在我身边而已。” The poor husband You cant imagine how difficult it is for me to deal with my wife, the man complained to his friend. She asks me a question, then answers it herself, and after that she explained to me for half an hour why my answer is wrong. 可怜的丈夫 “你根本无法想象和我妻子打交道是多么的难，”一个男人对他的朋友诉苦说，“她问我一个 问题，然后自己回答了，过后又花半个小时跟我解释为什么我的答案是错的。” 中大英才 中大英才 Do you think its the light thats attracting them? Mike and his pregnant wife live on a farm in a rural area in the west of England. No running water, no electricity, etc. One night, Mikes wife is begins to deliver the baby. The local doctor is there in attendance. What dya want me to do, Doctor? Hold the lantern, Mike. Here it comes! the doctor delivers the child and holds it up for the proud father to see. Mike, youre the proud father of a fine strapping boy. Saints be praised, I... Before Mike can finish the Doctor interrupts, Wait a minute. Hold the lantern, Mike. Soon the doctor delivers the next child. Youve a full set now, Mike. A beautiful baby daughter. Thanks be to... Again the Doctor cuts in, Hold the lantern, Mike, Hold the lantern! Soon the Doctor