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英语听力练习（笑话） Beer for washing hair啤酒是洗头用的Two nuns were shopping and happened to be passing the beer store. One asks the other if she would like a beer. The other nun answered that would be good, but that she would be queasy about purchasing it. The first nun said that she would handle it and picked up a six pack and took it to the cashier. The cashier had a surprised look and the first nun said, The beer is used for washing our hair. The cashier, without blinking an eye, reached under the counter and put a package of pretzels in the bag with the beer, saying. . .Here, dont forget the curlers. 两个修女外出购物，路过一家啤酒店。其中一个修女问另外一个要不要买点啤酒喝。那个修女回答说她是想喝，但不太敢去买。第一个修女说她会搞定，说罢拿起一提六瓶装的啤酒，来到收银台。看到收银员的表情有点怪，第一个修女说，“我们买啤酒是用来洗头的。” 收银员，眼皮都没有眨一下，把手伸进柜台下面，拿出一包椒盐饼干放到装啤酒的袋子里面，说“嘿，卷发器可不能少!”Another 40 Years to live 再活40年 A middle aged woman had a heart attack and was taken to the hospital. While on the operating table she had a near death experience. Seeing God, she asked if this was it. God said, No you have another 43 years, 2 months, and 8 days to live. Upon recovery the woman decided to stay in the hospital and have a face lift, lip-suction, breast augmentation, tummy tuck, etc. She even had someone come in and change her hair color, figuring since she had so much more time to live, she might as well make the most of it. She got out of the hospital after the last operation and while crossing the street was killed by an ambulance speeding to the hospital. Arriving in front of God, she demanded, I thought you said I had another 40 Years? God replied, I didnt recognize you. 一名中年妇女心脏病突发被送到了医院，在手术台上，濒临死亡之际，她看到了上帝，于是，她问上帝是不是她的日子到头了。上帝回答说，“还没有，你还能活43年，2个月零8天。” 身体快要康复的时候，这名女士想到自己还要活那么多年，得好好对待自己，于是决定先不出院，而是去给自己整整容，吸吸脂，隆隆胸，然后还做了一个腹部拉皮和其它一些美容美体手术。她甚至还请人到医院里面帮她头发给染了。做完最后一个手术，这位女士出院了，但就在过马路的时候，她被一辆风驰电挚赶回医院的救护车给撞死了。再一次，她又站到了上帝的面前，她大惑不解地问上帝，“我记得你说我还能再活40年？” 上帝回答，“那个时候我没认出你来”。 A dumb boy笨小孩A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer ..., This is the dumbest kid in the wo