长寿秘诀等４则.docVIP

长寿秘诀等４则 　　长寿秘诀 　　一位女士走向坐在门廊的椅子上摇动的小老头。“我无意中发现，你是多么幸福，”那女士说。“你幸福而长寿的秘密是什么？” 　　“我每天抽三包烟，每周喝一箱威士忌，吃高脂肪食品，而且从来不曾锻炼。” 　　“哦，真神奇，”女士说,“你高寿？” 　　“二十六。” 　　 　　Secret For A Long Life 　　A woman walks up to a little old man rocking in a chair on his porch. 　　I couldnt help noticing how happy you look, she says. Whats your secret for a long, happy life? 　　I smoke three packs a day, drink a case of whiskey a week, eat fatty foods and never, ever exercise. 　　Wow, thats amazing, says the woman. How old are you? 　　Twenty-six. 　　 　　成功法则 　　年轻的医生：哦，爸，现在我都挂牌开诊了，你能给我些成功法则吗？ 　　父亲：总是把药方写的难以辨认，而帐单却清清楚楚。 　　 　　Rules for Success 　　Young doctor: Well, Dad, now that Im hanging out my shingle, can you give me some rules for success? 　　Father: Always write your prescriptions illegibly and your bills very plainly. 　　 　　两颗心脏在跳动 　　护士：手术后你感觉怎样？ 　　病人：十分好，只是我能感觉到我体内有两颗心脏在跳动。 　　护士：怪不得给你做手术的大夫刚才在到处寻找他的手表。 　　 　　Two Hearts Beating 　　Nurse: How do you feel after your operation? 　　Patient: Quite alright, only I can feel two hearts beating inside me. 　　Nurse: No wonder the doctor who operated on you was looking for his watch everywhere just now. 　　 　　脑筋急转弯 　　1.全世界死亡率最高的地方在哪里? 　　2.市里新开张了一家医院，设备先进，服务周到，但令人奇怪的是，这儿竟一位病人都不收，这是为什么？ 　　 　　钱和朋友 　　甲：你认为钱和朋友哪一个更重要？ 　　乙：当然是朋友。 　　甲：为什么？ 　　乙：我总可以从朋友那儿借到钱。 　　 　　Money and Friends 　　A: Which do you find more important, money or friends? 　　B: Friends, of course. 　　A: Why? 　　B: I can always borrow money from friends. 　　 　　 脑筋急转弯答案： 　　 1.In the bed 　　 2.Veterinary hospital 3