闲聊还得讲的技巧.docVIP

闲聊还得讲的技巧 　　有时候，沟通真的不仅仅是语言的问题，更是一种懂得察言观色的态度、一个贴心的配合。 　　 　　Here’s how to start great small talk. Use the mood match technique. 　　Several years ago the Mensa organization, a social group of extremely bright individuals who score in the country’s top 2% in intelligence, invited me to be the keynote speaker at their annual convention. I don’t know why because I don’t even qualify to be in their group. 　　Anyway, their cocktail party was 2)in full swing in the lobby of the hotel as I arrived. After checking in, I 3)hauled my bags through the 4)horde of happy-hour Mensans to the elevator. The doors separated and I stepped into an elevator packed with party-goers. As we began the journey up to our 5)respective floors, the elevator gave several sleepy 6)jerks. 　　“Hmm,” I remarked in response to the elevator’s 7)sluggishness, “The elevator seems a little 8)flaky.”Suddenly each elevator occupant, feeling 9)compelled to exhibit his or her 132-plus IQ, 10)pounced forth with a 11)thunderous explanation. “Oh, it’s obviously got poor rail-guide 12) alignment,” announced one. “The relay contact is not made up,” declared another. Suddenly I felt like a 13)grasshopper trapped in a 14)stereo speaker. I couldn’t wait to escape the attack of the mental giants. 　　Afterward, in the 15)solitude of my room, I thought back and reflected that the Mensans’ answers were, indeed, interesting. Why, then, did I have such an 16)adverse reaction? I realized it was too much, too soon. I was tired. Their high energy and 17)intensity 18)jarred my 19)sluggish state. 　　You see, small talk is not about facts, or words. It’s about music, about melody. Small talk is about putting people at ease. It’s about making comforting noises together, like cats purring, or children humming, or groups chanting. You must first match your listener’s mood. 　　Instead of jumping in with such intensity, the Mensans could have momentarily matched my 20)lethar-gic mood by saying “Yeah, it really is slow, isn’t it?” Had