地道英语英文笑话5 English Jokes.docVIP

地道英语英文笑话5 English Jokes By Y.W Saint peter greets a man at the Pearly Gates. “What have you done to deserve entry into heaven?” he asked. “As I was driving along the highway, I came upon a gang of tough bikes threatening a young woman,” sys the man. “So I went up to the biggest, meanest biker and punched him in the nose. Then I kicked over his bike, yanked his ponytail and ripped out his nose ring. When I finished with him, I turned to the rest of the gang and said, ‘Leave this woman alone or you’ll have to answer to me!’” Saint Peter was impressed. “ When did this happen ?” “Just a couple o minutes ago.” E.T.THOMPSON How many stockbrokers does it take to change a light bulb? Two-one to take out the bulb and drop it, and another to try to sell it before it crashes (knowing it has already burned out). DAVID PEARCE A furniture manufacturer visited for his factory. He want to a disco on his first night and met a beautiful blonde girl at the bar. As neither spoke or understood the language of the other, they had to use graphic expression for communication. He drew glass with a drink and an ice cube, she agreed, and they both had a drink. The music was inviting so he drew a pair of people dancing. She agreed again. They danced and danced before returning to the bar. The girl then drew a wardrobe, bedside tables and a bed. Looking at the drawing , his face lit up. “Yes, yes!” he exclaimed. “I’m a furniture manufacturer!” ANTONIO QUEIROZ A man walks into a cardiologist’s office. Man: “Excuse me. Can you help me? I think I’m a moth.” Doctor: “You don’t need a cardiologist. You need a psychiatrist.” Man: “Yes. I know.” Doctor: “So why did you come in here if you need a psychiatrist?” Man: “The light was on.”