表达观点类作文点拨.docVIP

表达观点类作文点拨 　　【试题呈现】 　　《爸爸去哪儿》的大热引发了人们对于亲子话题的关注。孩子的教育在古今中外都是一个永恒的话题。英语中有句谚语：“Spare the rod，spoil your child.”意思是“孩子不打不成器”。请就此说法，结合生活中的事例，写一篇120词左右的文章，谈谈你对家庭教育的看法。 　　【审题点拨】 　　此题将时下流行的话题与学生的具体生活连接在一起，具有很强的时效性和生活气息。对于“孩子不打不成器”这一观点同学们可赞成亦可反对，只要结合具体的事例加上言之有理的论述即可。在具体行文中，同学们可在第一段引入话题并直接阐明自己的观点，第二段结合事例论证观点，最后一段总结全文并再次重申自己的观点。行文中一定要确保观点清晰明确。 　　表达观点类作文常用句型： 　　Opinions are divided on the question. 　　Some are in favor of it.（be for / approve of / agree / support ...） 　　In their opinion，... / They hold the view that... 　　Others hold the opposite opinion（be against / disagree ...）. They argue that ... 　　Every coin has two sides. 　　As far as I am concerned ... / In my opinion ... 　　【习作一】 　　As the saying goes，“Spare the rod，spoil your child.”Most parents think it is a privilege to punish a child，but it is harmful to children’s health. Family education should be given rice to concern. 　　When I was a child，I was too active to do something terrible. First of all，my mother often talked with me，but I didn’t attach importance to it. Then I made the same mistake again. My father was so angry that he punished me severely. I was very sad and crying for a long time. Then I refuse talking with him and didn’t eat food to show my resistance. And my parents apologized to me. Then they thought educating a child needs to talk more with him rather than punish him. 　　Now I am outstanding and live happy. 　　这是一篇中档习作。其优点是： 　　（1）层次分明，结构清晰，要点明确。 　　（2）活学活用了一些考纲词汇，如privilege，severely，resistance等。此外，作者也恰到好处地使用了一些短语，如be harmful to，attach importance to，apologize to sb.等。 　　不足之处： 　　（1）个别单词和短语拼写或表达有误。如“should be given rice to concern”应改为“should be given proper concern”。“I was too active to do something terrible”应改为“I was so active and naughty that I always did something terrible”。“Then I refuse talking with him”可改为“I was reluctant to talk with him”。 　　（2）个别逻辑词的选用不当。如first of all多用在表达观点而非陈述事情的发展上，可改成at first。过渡词then在文中出现了三次，有重复单调之嫌，可换成其他递进词（如later，gradually，next），从而让语言表达更富多样性。 　　（3）要点基本齐